I would like to know if I could decrease the quantity of semen I ejaculate

Q:

Hi. I would like to know if I could decrease the quantity of semen I ejaculate. It turns into an inconvenience at times when me and my girlfriend have sex. She even refuses at times to give me oral sex because the semen gets overwhelming. Any advice would be good. Thank you.

A:

Thanks for your question! First, every body is different and everyone makes different amounts of ejaculate or vaginal fluid.  There is absolutely nothing medical or physically wrong with too much ejaculate! However, it sounds like it is an inconvenience and not a turn on for your partner.

First, do you use a condom when you two have sex? Does the semen spill out of the condom? If so, the condom is no longer effective, and I would encourage your partner to get a pregnancy test if she is not on another form of birth control.  When using condoms, it is important to leave room at the tip for semen.  If the condom is put tightly on the penis, semen will certainly leak out, make a mess, and nullify much of the protection of the condom! Each condom has a little pointy tip that is meant to fit loosely over the tip of the penis, leaving room for semen.  For folks who have more ejaculate, make sure you leave more room at the tip!

In terms of your girlfriend not wanting to have oral sex because of the amount of semen, that's completely understandable.  In that situation, I would encourage you to find a way to enjoy oral sex that doesn't involve ejaculating on her or in her mouth.  Communication is key with this one.  If you feel like you are about to ejaculate, have another place to put it! Could you ejaculate in your hand, in a rag, shirt, or tissue?  You can also use a condom for oral sex – remember to leave space at the tip!  If she likes giving you oral sex, but doesn't like the amount of ejaculate, these might be fair compromises. 

While there is no way that I know of to reliably reduce the amount of semen one ejaculates, for some people, extended sexual stimulation with no release can build up the amount of semen.  Are you only having orgasms with your girlfriend? Are you regularly masturbating?  If you are feeling sexually stimulated and waiting to have sex in order to release, that wait could build up a higher amount of semen.  The remedy for this is more frequent masturbation!

Lastly, sex is messy.  It is not supposed to be clean, dry, and simple.  If using condoms, increasing the amount of space at the tip of the condom, finding alternative locations for ejaculate, or more frequent masturbation does not help – all I can say is embrace the mess! Good luck!